Earlier this week, Naomi Dunford suggested my profile picture may be the best background on Twitter. *Blush*

Truth be told, there are two stars in this picture, both of them getting some serious help from the spectacular dress I was lucky enough to wear.

I chose this picture because for me, it completely encapsulates the real backstage world. The one you don’t see from the audience.

This is the Everyday Diva.

When this picture was taken, I was in the middle of a very fast costume change that takes place right before my character’s big aria in Act 4 of The Marriage of Figaro by Mozart.

You can see my dresser doing up my shoes – every leading role in opera/theatre gets one – with all those corsets and laces and buttons and hoops and only 5 minutes to change from one thing to the next, you need all the help you can get.

I have my little keyboard in front of me – the one small enough to take in a suitcase wherever I went, so I could warm up or note bash on a train or plane or whatever. (I use an app for that now.)

There’s my mobile, an unused mini coffee plunger, lots of makeup, and a head for the wig I am wearing. (My real hair is at the front though.)

There is a horrible looking dressing table slash office desk (dodgy furniture is compulsory in all but the grandest and most loved up opera houses.) And you can just make out the lights around the mirror from their shadows on the wall  – a lighted mirror being probably the one concession to glamour in this entire shot.

I love this photo so much because of the contradictions. The perceived extravagance of the sets and costumes and the rituals of the prima donna, versus the slightly messy reality of having to swig as much water as possible in the panting, breathless undressing and dressing that comes before your biggest moment on the stage.

The twang of notes on my children’s keyboard versus the shimmering textures of the orchestra a few walls away.

It’s the life of an opera singer as I know it.

Because the world of backstage is not the same as the one center stage.

When you stand in the spotlight for your finest moment, you have to do it again and again, because there is never going to be just one. There will be times that you nail it so memorably that they become warm and fuzzy self-esteem beacons that you can hang your pride on. But for the most part, as an artist or creative shipper of any kind, you just keep moving towards that spotlight and delivering.

Making as much magic as you can. Singing your truth with all the beauty and convinction that you can gather with the resources that you have.

But likely, the backstage world, where you prepare for your moment in the sun will stay hidden to your crowd.

They won’t see the bare dressing room where you shiver with stage fright and smear your makeup with shit scared tears. Where you amass a room full of good luck bouquets and a shelf lined with cards of good luck and love. Where you steel yourself, rally yourself, center and console yourself in equal measure.

They don’t see the world where you prepare and stress and fail. Your journey to the spotlight is yours alone.

And this is where your work really lies.

The hundreds and even thousands of hours you put into your work backstage are what make the center stage moments look as effortless as possible. Where you live the struggle and the mistakes as well as the tiny victories along the way, roll them up under your glamorous costume and then just let go.

Because this is the challenge we face trying to get into a state of flow. It’s not the being in flow itself that’s important, because once your there, your there.

It’s the getting up to speed, the way you might paddle on a board to catch a wave.

So go learn your craft. Make mistakes. Get messy. Enjoy the chaos. It’s all part of the preparation that goes towards the beautiful moment out there in the spotlight. The place where all the hard work becomes worthwhile.

Comments – Sing It Back To Me

Is your world backstage feeding your genius onstage? What can you do to make your “dressing room” more supportive, and your preparation more kind to yourself and the magic you want to create for your audience?

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